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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25537780">As I Fade</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beazel/pseuds/Beazel'>Beazel</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hunter X Hunter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Character Death, Major Spoilers, Other</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 09:16:09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,397</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25537780</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beazel/pseuds/Beazel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A brief look through a Royal Guards eyes.</p><p>During Neferpitous short life they come to an  important understanding.</p><p>There is no one true meaning of the word love.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Minor or Background Relationship(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>As I Fade</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p><p><br/>
There is thrill in the hunt.</p><p>In the way the preys pulse quickens, thrumming violently against a cage of ribs, as if in an attempt to escape. When realization darkens their features in understanding.</p><p>These will be their final moments. </p><p>An intimacy shared between two. That’s why when the Royal Guard senses a group of Nen users... One, Two, Three humans! The ants own heart begins to pick up speed, excitement with each beat.  </p><p>They must pretty strong to have made it this close to the hive.</p><p>Pitou can’t help but let a smile stretch across the plane of exoskeleton. </p><p>Adrenaline flooding cobalt blue veins as they make the leap through the chill night sky. Closing the gap between the prey.</p><p>A feeling like no other.</p><p>
  <em>Could this be love?</em>
</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
The moon shines so brightly. </p><p>Pale light peeks behind the hanging canopy above, creating a shadowing effect on the mossy earth below. Though Pitou doesn’t need the moons guidance to see the wash of dark crimson underneath their fingernails.</p><p>The Guards fingers run through long silver strands resting in their lap. Coming down from the high Pitou is left to wallow in victory.</p><p>For the Hunter, the one whose head is now nothing more than a idle source of entertainment, escape had been possible.</p><p>It had been obvious during their fight, he had been someone with years of experience.</p><p>Experience the other two Nen users clearly lacked. By using them as decoys his survival might have been possible. </p><p>
  <em>So why hadn’t he?</em>
</p><p>One of the Hunters, a mere child, had attempted to join the fray. Shouting as he readied an attack...  Before being knocked unconscious by his own teammate, a white haired boy of the same age. </p><p>Really, it was an unusual display. One Pitou doesn’t care to put a lot of thought into.</p><p>Maybe, just maybe, the Royal Guard had given the Hunters too much credit. </p><p>Still, no matter how weak, how dumb humans maybe appear to be, tonight proved they can provide an interesting hunt.</p><p>It’s enough to keep Pitou in high spirits.</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
Neferpitou sees it.</p><p>It’s clear in the way the Queen carries herself. In the way she cradles her protruding abdomen.</p><p>A mothers tenderness.</p><p>In its truest form. </p><p>The ant is grateful for the name bestowed upon them. For the Queen to take the time to name them, the Royal Guard, individually is an honor. </p><p>They are not worthy of such affection.</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
At long last, the King had finally been born. </p><p>The day that will be forever be cemented as the start of Pitous life.</p><p>His Masjesty takes out the foolish ant commander in one fluid motion. To fast, even for the Guards cat like eye.</p><p>More magnificent, more powerful than any who dare stand before him. There was no question that the King was fit, no, born for his role. </p><p>To conquer the world and rule all life forms.</p><p>It’s overwhelming, the rush of loyalty and protectiveness that flood them at his birth.</p><p>Unconditional.</p><p>It comes so easy, like second nature. The day they can <em>truly</em> follow command. </p><p>The way Neferpitou was meant to.</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
Nothing goes unnoticed in the palace.</p><p>But this. </p><p>“What, is my name?”</p><p>This was a surprise unforeseen by everyone.</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
Really, it’s something Pitou had not been prepared to face consequences for.</p><p>The Guard is reprimanded. For not closely watching over the Gungi players safety.</p><p>When that miserable bird attacked, it had been the easiest, most correctable mistake the Guard has ever made.</p><p>An error that will not be made again.</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
“Pitou.”</p><p>This is unheard of.</p><p>Pitous vision begins to blur at the edges with moisture. It’s foreign.</p><p>There’s a swell of emotions, so strong Pitou almost gets swept away in the storm. But between drowning and the raging waves there is something so clear it’s akin to a sunny patch of shore. A safe haven in a hurricane.</p><p>“Heal Komugi.”</p><p>This is the Kings true self. </p><p>Pitou will do everything in their power to protect <em>this.</em></p><p>
  <em>No matter the cost.</em>
</p><p>“I’m counting on you.”</p><p>The words resonate. Like a prayer.</p><p>His Majesty needs no further explanation, Pitou understands the weight of the order.</p><p>Now on the cracked tiled of the battlefield, in a pool of crimson lyes someone important. <em>So incredibly important. </em></p><p>A small, blind, defenseless human woman who has brought forth something that will forever change the future of all living species in this world. </p><p>Without a moments notice, before even blinking away the tears, Pitou summons Doctor Blythe. </p><p>
  <em>There is no time to waste.</em>
</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
</p><p>
  <em>In and out. In and out.</em>
</p><p>Not accustomed to, <em>healing.</em></p><p>Doctor Blythe is far more familiar to tearing, ripping that which was once lost. But not on the living.</p><p>Every fiber of their being is focused on the task before them. </p><p>There is no room for error.</p><p>Mute footsteps close in from behind. Without En the Guard doesn’t notice right away.</p><p>And oh, how they wish they had.</p><p>Their Hatsu is now Neferpitous down fall. There is no way to prepare for the fast approaching confrontation, or any form of action really. Instincts kicking into an all time high, fight or flight, there’s just one thing holding them back. </p><p>Komugis delicate form lyes behind Pitou, the ant using their own body as a shield, putting them self between the enemy and her.</p><p>To move the unconscious woman’s body, with her guts splayed out for all to see was a plan with high risk and low chance of success. </p><p>Leaving her to die would be the ultimate sin.</p><p>It is not even an option.</p><p>Left with no other choice the Guard faces the intruders alone, all the while protecting someone whose life holds more valuable than their own.</p><p>The weight of this burden rests heavy on their shoulders. </p><p>It is the first time Pitous heart races not out of excitement or thrill. </p><p>
  <em>Thump. Thump. Thump.</em>
</p><p>But out of fear.</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
Pitou thinks they might finally understand why the Hunter choose to fight, to die that night.</p><p>“What did you say your name was?”</p><p>Even when they break the death like silence the catacombs bare no life. Just like man before them.</p><p>The man who choose death.</p><p>Silver hair so long it reaches the tiled floor as he kneels, with his scarred back facing towards them. The gashes run deep, their battle forever engraved into the skin laid bare. </p><p>
  <em>They will never heal.</em>
</p><p>“Gon. Gon Freecs.”</p><p>Pitou intends to remember the name. He’s earned at least this small form of remembrance. </p><p>A permanent grave. Forever etched into their mind.</p><p>Even if it’s only in his enemies memory. </p><p>“Gon... You listened to my request. That’s why, I want to be honest with you.”</p><p>He should know before...</p><p>“This man. He is already dead.”</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
“I have to kill you. For the King.”</p><p><br/>
—</p><p><br/>
This, is an act of love. </p><p>Twisted and righteous it seeks only one thing. </p><p>
  <em>Judgement. </em>
</p><p>Wading in and out of the tides of consciousness Pitou can barely register the thunderous foot fall. The sound becoming ever louder as <strong>he</strong> continues the march forward. But, to what end?</p><p>Luckily Pitou knows exactly how this will end. And for that they are grateful. Sacrificing Nen and ones own life energy, years of potential now wasted, for <em>this</em>. </p><p>One final act of grief. </p><p>This will end with Pitous life.</p><p>The pale light shines just like that night so many moons ago. Maybe it’s fate.</p><p>The figure of a man appears through the forests tree line. Slowly he makes his way towards the practically lifeless form, now slumped against the base of a tree. </p><p>Pitou understands. </p><p>The horror of losing someone important. A fear so strong it shakes the very foundation Pitou stands atop of. </p><p>
  <em>Apex predator. Top of the food chain.</em>
</p><p>All meaningless in the face of reality. There is nothing more sobering than fear. It grasps the Guards very being in an iron like hold, unshakable and unforgiving. </p><p>The thought of Gon unleashing his hatred, his <em>sorrow</em> on the King or Komugi is worse than any punishment imaginable. </p><p>Worse than death.</p><p>“<em>Jan —</em>“</p><p>
  <em>That’s why... </em>
</p><p>“— <strong>Ken!</strong>”</p><p>Bloodied fist comes crashing down one last time, and with it fall wet droplets.</p><p>
  <em>Tears. </em>
</p><p>The sound travels for miles, the sound of a skull being shattering into a thousand little pieces. </p><p>
  <em>That’s why, as Pitou fades out of this life and into the next it is their final act of love.</em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Short story of my fav hxh ant. I plan on doing more hxh stories in the future, it’s my bread and butter. </p><p>Hope Pitou stans like it xoxo</p></blockquote></div></div>
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